How many time have you heard the word "pacifist"? At least a hundred times, I bet. And you thought about them (or becoming one) at least once or twice. Well, allow me to crush some dreams!
"Pacifist" generally means "opposed to any kinds of violence or war". That is the simplest, and most accepted definition, so let's stick with it for this little article.
There are two kinds of pacifists: ones who refuse to fight back when physically abused (i.e. punched in the nose or kicked in the balls), and ones who refuse to kill any living being. Both types do (or don't do) what they do because they believe any violence is immoral, and they will get beat up by some Big God after they kick the bucket, or get "bad karma" stuff. Yes, that's right: turn the other cheek, or go to Hell, bitch!
Now, when I (sort of) established who pacifists are and why they do what they do, I will explain why all pacifists in the world are hypocrites.
How many of you got sick at least once? I am pretty sure those who didn't are the legendary humans of legend, CAUSE EVERYONE GET SICK AT LEAST ONCE. Alright, with that established, how many of you wish to not get sick? Probably every single one of you. How many of you would like to have better health and better immune system? Again, everyone. Good. Health. Immune system. How does the latter work, again? Oh yes, it is a DEFENSE MECHANISM THAT KILLS MICROSCOPIC LIFEFORMS AND PARASITES THAT TRY TO KILL YOU. You kill millions of bacteria (and viruses and parasites) each day to stay healthy and alive.
Now, you might say that bacteria, viruses and parasites are somehow different from other lifeforms, and totally okay to kill, so your karma does not care. BULLSHIT. You are trying to weasel out of your own contract. To be a pacifist, you must NEVER kill in defense.
So, "true pacifists" out there, hear me out. To keep your namesake, turn off your immune system... now! Allow microscopic lifeforms slowly kill your body. Do not fight back. Do not kill them. Allow them to kill YOU.
That is the only way to Buddha Heaven, amirite?